I Don't Wanna Twitter!

I am already Linked. I save Face at least weekly, if not daily. There is biznik. There is Ladies Who Launch. There is stuff happening in person too and of course, there's this bodacious blog! One list I am on - helpareporter.com (join it!) - keeps talking about the virtues of Twitter and an Internet reality business show I have been following off and on mentioned it last night too. So I asked someone who is more plugged in than I am (and I am pretty plugged in for a busy mommy) and she said yeah. It's not a waste of time. Darn it! Like I need one more thing to keep up with! I want to rebel. I want to run. I want to keep my eyes closed to this phenomeneon but darn it, I have a business to grow and a book to finish writing. I can't afford to hide in the corner.

It's up, you know. Twitter. On another screen, baiting me to come look at it. Yeah, yeah. I hear you. Sucking me into one more thing to get addicted to.

By the way, I need good salespeople. One really great one will do but I'm willing to talk to a few. Here's my ad. Know anyone? Send them my way!

We need help. We create unique, fun jigsaw puzzles - greeting card jigsaw puzzles and custom jigsaw puzzles. We are a 3-year-old, home-based company founded on the third principle of the Nguzo Saba - Ujima, which means Collective Work & Responsibility. We are dedicated to promoting the collective and creative works of all cultures for the purpose of providing quality, authentic, multicultural puzzles and educational products. We are a dynamic duo with complementary gifts and talents and the shared gift of helping others in a variety of ways. We need someone with a passion for sales who can see our vision and help us turn leads into sales. We need you to be able to operate within our parameters of putting people first and always striving to do the right thing despite the general consensus. PLEASE DO NOT REPLY IF YOU NEED TO BE PAID NOW. We need you to work by commission only and help us get where we know we are destined to be so that we can all share in the coming success. If interested, please email us at villageworks@sbcglobal.net. We would like someone in CT but we are open to finding someone from any location with a passion equal to our own.

Ta ta. Off to Twitter!

It's Gettin' Kind of Hectic

I can't even list things. My mind is a little scattered and creating lists helps me to get it back together. It's all good, it's all growth potential but it's all over the place and I need to get my thoughts together.

• I'm talking to multiple buyers and a couple of connected bloggers about the greeting card puzzles.
• We're preparing a packet of things to send to small, but select, vending event down South where we will be sponsors and they will pitch us to gift basketeers.
• I'm talking to a storeowner about our next puzzle and letting her help guide the design because she likes the concept and will buy it if the execution is just as good. She also knows toy reps and will connect us there later on.
• Press releases are going out and we've done one newspaper interview so far. We're doing a podcast interview next Saturday.
• More networking.
• More writing.
• More work!

I kept thinking about my kids. I've been busy all this time but this is different because I am fishing in a much larger pond these days, taking more risks, and I continue to believe we are closer than we realize. It's like exercising. If you do it every day, you may hate it but eventually you start to see results and things get better overall for you though it may never get any easier - just better. If you stop for too long, you go practically back to square one. So I keep pushing. And pushing. And thinking, "I have to make sure they are with me." You can never be too sure just how much your kids know or understand until you take the time to talk to them. It's astounding just how affected they can be by something that you thought was no big deal. Or just how easy it is for them to go with the flow when you think they should be devastated. Unpredictable and flexible. That's them.

So I'm thinking, "I have to talk to them. I have to be sure." People are always asking me where I get my energy from. They wonder how I can do as much as I do. And certainly I have to sacrifice in one area in order to succeed in another but it's not either/or. It's sacrifice on one hand today for success on the other. Tomorrow you may need to switch up. That, my friends, is balance. But sacrifice is always a part of it and, like it or not, the kids will sacrifice too. Maybe you can't do as much with them or for them as you'd like while getting things off the ground. Maybe you aren't as patient as you'd like to be. Maybe you aren't as attentive as you should be. Personally, I think it's better to be honest about these things and I have accepted the fact that some days I will get it all right and some days I won't. But I am thinking as long as I keep them in the loop, we should all come out of this OK.

I went to a dinner tonight to celebrate the latest group of grads from the business workshop I had done about 5 years ago. I had already come home about 9:30 last night because Bizzy Girl and I had to talk numbers for a potential buyer. But I had said I would go to the dinner and I wanted to because one woman to whom I had recommended the program was going to be among the grads. I had to support her. So two late nights in a row. Something I try not to do.

It started at 6 and I was determined to hustle out of there by 9 at the latest, and only that because the dinner was in the same town I live in so it wouldn't take forever to get home. "Gotta get home to the kids. Gotta get home to the kids. We have to talk. We have to talk!" At 9:05 the dinner was done but I had to talk to 2 of the grads who might be good connections for my business. I had to talk to my friend who graduated but she was busy talking to the guy who founded the program, as she should. So I talked to the people with her who also happen to own the store where our puzzles were (yes were. But it's not over. Later on that topic.) It's was about 9:30 when I finally made it out.

Someone, amazingly, had thought to leave the light on outside. Usually I'm the one who thinks like that. I am guessing the kids were just playing around with the lights and didn't realize the outside light had gone on. Before I could get all the way in the house Daughter bounds down the stairs. "Son was crying for you." Great. I am coming home to make sure we're all playing on the same team and he's crying for me. Can you spell GUILT? But he's never done that before. I've come home this same time many times prior. Why tonight?

"What do you mean he's crying? For what?"

"He was waiting and waiting for you but you didn't come home." Oh brother.

So I ask him. "Why were you crying for me? I've come home this time before."

"Usually you come home at 8:30."

"But last night I came home this time. Why cry?"

"Because I love you." Again - oh brother.

If you all haven't figured this out yet, let me clue you in on my personality. I may want to talk about something but if you ask me about it before I am ready, I will get annoyed. I may realize something needs to be fixed, but if you complain about it just the very second before I do something about it, I will get annoyed. I may know my kids are wishing they had more of me but if they tell me they had more of me before I tell THEM let's talk about it, I will get annoyed. This is me. I can't explain it any more than that.

"Let's talk. Mommy has always been busy but things are a little different right now and I may be even busier than before. I am trying not to have things so busy that you rarely see me. I am trying to balance it so I will do something one day and choose not to do something another day so I am here with you. But the fact is I am trying very hard to make something grow and I am doing it for you all as well as me. I am using the gifts God gave me. I love it all and I am happy. But I want to be sure you both know that this is for you too. I want you to see that God gave you gifts and you can choose to use them in a traditional way or a nontraditional way but just use them and be happy. That's what I want for you."

Daughter asks, "Why are you telling us this?" Son simply clings to my arm because that what he does. I stick my tongue out at her and keep going.

"So, what I want to know is, is there anything, as a mommy, you wish I would do or would NOT do?" I know I am setting myself up here for loads of guilt. Bring on the, "I wish you were home more often." and "I wish you'd read to us more." or maybe "I wish you would sit and play more often." I do all these things. But I think most parents feel they don't do it enough. What do the kids think?

"I wish you'd be rich," Daughter says. "I'm trying! Son?"

"Hmmm. I wish you would not be mean to us and take away our blankets and pillows and make us sleep on the floor."

"Excuse me? When have I ever done that?"

"You haven't, so I wish you never do."

"Ohhh kaaay. Well, that's not likely to happen anyway. So of the things I DO do, what would you like me to do differently?"

"I wish you could give us lots of money," Daughter pipes up again. This is not the deep, meaningful, heartfelt conversation I was looking for. "Yeah. I got that. I told you I'm working on it. Son?"

"I wish you'd let us help with your business." Finally. Something real.

"But I do. If I go vending and you go along, you help."

"Oh yeah. Ummmmm." He taps his chin with his finger, grinning in the air as he thinks of God knows what.

"You know, if you have to make stuff up, it can't be too bad huh?"

"I wish you could do magic!" Daughter has found a stray tangent to follow.

"I love you," Son responds to a question that I think only he heard in his head.

So maybe they aren't feeling like orphans after all. And maybe I'll do more to talk about my business to them to make them feel a part of things, which is all they really want from me anyway - to be included. Maybe they are doing just fine.

Planting Seeds

I've been having the best time networking lately. It's hard to delineate everything because it's all so intertwined - the people, the places, the ideas. One woman I met at a marketing event last night was intrigued by my business and we talked about how we could work together. She had earlier spoken about the frustrations of running her non-profit and I could sense a certain kinship with her based on what she was doing and how she was doing it and what was standing in her way.

As we talked, I told her about my own frustration, being so near and yet so far. Trying to do a lot with a little time. Just feeling so scattered sometimes because we are trying to take advantage of opportunities as they come up but that's what makes you feel so scattered.

"You know so many people think it's linear," she said. "But when you really think about it, it's circular. You're planting seeds here and there and soon they will germinate and grow all around you!" I love that thought. Thank you, Christine. It fits and it makes sense to me.

Christine and I have to further discuss what our puzzles could do to further the vision of her non-profit.

I also met Andrea and yes, I am using real names because these women have businesses that need to be promoted. Now, I started talking to Andrea by asking what she did but when she told me, my eyes widened because I could see it fitting in with the book I am working on. Did I mention this book here? It's actually one of the ones I worked on for NaNo back in 2006. Anyway, I told her what I was doing and we went back and forth, agreeing with each other and connecting in a way that felt more than the superficial networking connection one makes at these types of things. I liked her style. She felt real. I promised to call her and she insisted I do that. I know we'll be talking really soon and I know I'll be doing one of her events too. It just looks so cool!

Then there was the life coach who told me about Momference - a Meeting of the Moms is the tag. It's all about teleconferences on a variety of topics. I haven't had a chance to really get into the site but so far it does look like a place worth hanging out. I already see one conference I'd like to attend later this year - all from the comfort of home. What could be better than that?

It's just been one of those crazy times of promise. Dropping off Daughter at pre-school this morning, I saw a sign on the wall of the neighboring high school:



In case you can't see it, it says "Success is the sum of small efforts repeated day in and day out." Be consistent and persistent. I don't think we've been anything less than that, though there are times when the persistence is greater than others. I suppose this is one of those times.

There's been this marketing event and the branding one the week before that. I've been calling a few people about the puzzles and I have to send out samples. I've been talking to a self-publisher about the book and he was actually quite helpful, suggesting that I talk to a magazine publisher who not only may know some people I can talk to about being in my book but maybe could help on the puzzle front too. So I talked to the publisher and he sounded interested. At least he was enough to ask me to send him a sample to show around his office and to tell him a little more about the book while I'm at it because he knows some people who might fit the bill.

I've also been writing letters to people I want to talk to about being in my book. People who have achieved a certain level of success and notoriety. One of them called me yesterday. We're playing phone tag right now but she is the embodiment of what I am writing about and if she gets on board - maybe even write a forward for me - it will make it much easier to take this to an agent or a publisher and maybe I won't have to self-publish after all. I'm hoping she and I can meet since she's not that far. I'm hoping a lot of things right now.

Bizzy Girl and I have to meet this weekend. There is much to discuss and plan. I am the creative one so it's easy for me to go off on tangents. With her help, I can keep to a strategy and we can grow in a controlled fashion.

Now if you'll excuse me, I need to take my Daughter to say Happy Birthday to Trash-O-saurus.

Are You In?

Know what I did last night? Instead of writing my ninny novel that is 9,000 words away from done? Until 2 in the morning even though I was already tired after taking Son and Daughter to Son’s cub scout pack meeting – read, TONS o’kids instead of the usual dozen? I went Link crazy.

I’ll explain.

I got the kids settled, Son read his book, they went to bed, I washed dishes and accepted the fact that I would be missing Nip/Tuck for the night because I was too busy. It was already about 10:30 and I had eaten spareribs Mr. T had cooked between shouts at Daughter to go to bed for the 5th time. Nevertheless, I sat down for a moment to chill and look at this lovely catalog that had arrived in the mail. It was just my style, not cheap and full of unique looking stuff. I was intrigued and found some great gift ideas for a friend who is a new mom and one who is having her housewarming next month. And while I was at it, I found another possible gift idea for my nephew-in-law and his wife’s upcoming housewarming that I think is in January. I saw the company, which I had never heard of before, had a website so I checked it out.

“Ooooo! Wishlists! They have wishlists!”

So I saved the stuff I liked for me and I saved the potential gift ideas.

“Hmm, wishlists? Oh yeah! Amazon!”

Off I went because I haven’t updated that one in forever and I had some new books I wanted to keep track of. And I may as well throw in that Palm I still need. And how about some music? May as well get that list going too. And movies? Yep, add them on. And gee, Brain Age! I really have to get that one day. Toss that on the list too because I think this year I’m emailing it to Mr. T, just in case his siblings say, “Hey little brother, what should we get your wife this year?” Mom-in-law gives money so hopefully she’ll never ask him that question because I don’t take Discover or Visa or American Express but cash gets me everywhere I want to be.

Now that little wishlist update somehow, in my twisted mind, made me remember my business meeting from the night before and my internal struggle with networking. So vital yet so hard when you can’t go to 7:30 a.m. meetings. Not now, not ever. At least not until the kids are practically grown. But one way I can network in my own time is via LinkedIn.com.

You know it? If you are dealing with people in any way and if you really want to get ahead somehow in whatever you are doing, this is one way to help you do that. I joined before I took the job I have but I didn’t really work on growing it until I got into my new position and one of the people who was leaving did a mass email to many of us asking us to join his network. It’s been on my mind ever since to keep up with that.

Last night I had LinkedIn scan all my email addresses for people already in their system. Got about 10 new folk that way, some of whom still need to accept. Then I trolled one of my business groups that has over 300 members. I couldn’t send an invite to all of them because I don’t have everyone’s full name but of the ones I sent, I am still waiting on about 80 of them to reply somehow. A few already did. Sweet.

Then I went back in the contacts list to see who was on from my college days. And that’s where it got interesting. I didn’t know too many of those folk. One was a friend I still keep up with but we hadn’t Linked so we’ve done that now. One sounded soooo familiar that I emailed her to see if she’d write back and maybe we’ll Link. We’ll see. Then there was Mr. Popularity. A BMOC if ever there was one. He graduated two years before me and he was the president of the Kappas (Kappa Alpha Psi, for those who don’t know). He has an unforgettable name so of course I recognized it. I flashed back to my best friend at the time. She ADORED him. I can hear her drawing out his name now in the high-pitched squeal she had when she laughed. But we had to be seen as kids to him. At least I know she must have been seen that way because she always had a little girl way about her. (I told you, she is a former friend. Gets tiring after a while.)

So now he’s a lawyer in my town of birth, Washington, D.C. Surely he must be a BMOC there too I bet. I check his profile. THREE connections? Really? I’m kind of surprised. I mean in our small school, everybody knew his name. But maybe he really doesn’t care about networking in this manner, that’s all. Still, it struck me strange. I had to think. He doesn’t know me from Eve but after all these years, his thinking has to have matured right? Networking is networking right? It was amazing how I instantly flew back to not fitting in with his crowd. Not that I wanted to because they were not my type of people and I have NEVER fit in with the in-crowd in my life so why start then? But it kept me wondering. Contact him? Don’t contact him? No messages, per se, just an invite to Link and maybe a brief note so he’d realize we indeed have a connection even if he was oblivious to my existence back then? I looked at his name and kept thinking and just said do it. We weren’t friends then and I doubt we’d do anything for each other now anyway but you never know. Got for it. I did.

Now you think the story ends there don’t you? Nope.

I scanned more names. Remember how I told you my friend was nuts for this guy? Well I had one of those crushes myself so we had a good time baiting each other about our respective loves-of-our-lives-who-don’t know-we are-alive. And watching them. And stalking them, But only a little. (I was 17 and a freshman. Cut me some slack, eh?) Embarrassing, but true. But Maurice – yep his real name - wasn’t a Kappa. He was a laid-back Alpha (Alpha Phi Alpha. A Phi A. Ice ice baby.) He was quiet. He was smart because he was an accounting major and if you can work numbers, I applauded you then and still do. He stopped my heart every time I saw him but I was not the bold type. Got more bold as I got older but not then. I won’t tell you all the stuff I did with my friend in tow. It’s simply more than I care to tell. But we had fun doing it and it helped me break out of my semi-shyness to boot.

I don’t need to say more. You guessed it. He was there in all his glory. I always loved his last name because it was his and I had my days when I imagine it could be mine. Of course I recognized it instantly.

I checked out his profile. Nada. No connections at all. Kind of sad, actually. Made me want to pity link. He’s got no real info about him except where he works but that was interesting because he is in the same state we went to college in all those years ago. He doesn’t give his work history so I don’t know if he ever left or never left. He’s a CFO now. Good for him. I’m sure he must have a family because I wasn’t the only one who watched him and I knew I wouldn’t be the last. I remember the little Greek girl who came into the picture a year or so into our college days. And that’s what I and my friends called her – the little Greek girl – because she just didn’t fit the picture of who should be with Maurice in my mind and I had no respect for her simply because she existed. (I told you I was a teen-ager.) My friend and I watched her too. She was way to giggly for my taste. I don’t know how he tolerated it. Men.

So I check his contacts and he has it set not to receive InMail but I could invite him to Link if I wanted to. He has no connections right now for goodness sake. He’s crying out to be Linked! But do I dare? Do I tell him I inadvertently found him again and risk having him think I tracked him down all these years because clearly I have been waiting for my chance to cyberstalk him and pretending to be in hiding so he’d never suspect? I pondered. I left. I came back. I pondered some more. It was 2 in the morning. Time to call it a night.

Hooking up with friends and acquaintances of the past is cool and if Mr. Popular wants to Link, that would be fine too. But Maurice is on a glass-enclosed shelf all by himself and I’d rather leave him there in all that fantasized perfection. To re-connect at this stage in life and risk ruining my memories all for the sake of one more link in the networking chain is just not a chance I care to take. It’s nice to know I can go “visit” any time I like but there is no place like home.